Friday, April 20, 2007

The Diet Coke & Freezer Experiment

I was getting ready for work this morning and contemplating what to do with my damp, frizzy hair. I seem to be experiencing the pendulum effect from using a straightening iron on my hair.The more I straighten my hair, the frizzier it becomes when I don't.

I heard my eldest son yelling for his father. "Dad! DAAADDD! Come here! "
Whenever there is a crisis, Dad is the go to guy. At the moment let's just say he was indisposed.

" Dad can't come down right now" I yell. " What is the matter?!"

" Something happened to the freezer!" he yelled back.

"Oh shit!" I think to myself. " I bet I know what it is" I say while I bounding down the stairs. I just remembered that I had put a can of Diet Coke into the freezer as I was leaving the house last night to pick the boys up from Karate. I was going to enjoy a "cold one" when I got back home in half an hour or so. I guess I forgot.

"How bad is it?"
"Take a look for yourself!"

Oh crap! The can was split down the side, it must have burst at the seam. I never saw a can blow up that way, and for a brief moment I thought it was cool. Then I surveyed the carnage. I was going to have to completely take out all the shelves & frozen food to clean.

" Dad is going to kill you!"
"Do you think I can get this cleaned before he comes down?" I inquired as I frantically started to pull out the entire contents of the freezer. I scraped the frozen mess off the sides . Some of the Diet Coke chips went flying and relocated to hard to reach places as well as creating a mess on the kitchen floor.
At this point my middle child had arrived and was filled in on the situation by his older brother.

" This is why you never should put drinks in the freezer. Let this be a lesson to you boys" I warn. Like I had somehow planned this whole fiasco to serve as a demonstration on what not to do.
" We would never do that! You are gonna be in trouble!" they chimed in unison.

I felt like a child and then I remembered, " I'm an adult. What is my husband going to do? Spank me? I don't think so!"

I had made pretty good progress when down came Dad. " What happened?".
My middle son ratted me out before anyone else could. " Mom put a Diet Coke in the freezer and it exploded!"
"You big dummy!" my husband said. " You might want to put some clothes on. The neighbors can see through our sheers, you know!"

It was getting close to the time the children needed to leave for the bus stop and I was in my underwear. While I doubt anyone would see me, I didn't want to risk it. I ran upstairs, threw on some jeans & a tee shirt. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. If my husband was Don Imus, he would have called me a nappy-haired ho!

I went back to the scene of the crime, this time with clothes on! I worked fast and furious to finish. After what I thought was a thorough cleaning, I failed inspection. Twice!

I now had 5 minutes to fix my hair, put on make-up and find some clean clothes to wear for work. Needless to say I was late. On the bright side, it gave me something to bitch about to my workmates and to my friend David (who always has better horror stories). It also gave me something to blog about.

1 comment:

Barb D. said...

So what I'm witnessing here are two signs of early dementia.

First, forgetting about the Diet Coke in the freezer. I'm guessing you went to bed craving and didn't know why. Second, hello, standing in front of your school age boys in your underwear? From experience I can tell you that boys are twice as gossipy as girls. This story will be all over the playground. Other moms will talk about you. Let's not forget about their teachers. Kids love to share stories from home. It's great to be in parent/teacher conference and have the teacher say, "Oh, the stories he tells!" Suddenly every detail since the time of that kid's birth flashes before your eyes.

Life's little lessons.