Saturday, December 29, 2007

Evil Genius In the Making?

Tonight the boys have been playing and fighting on & off. One minute they're playing quietly and the next moment the younger two have been running to me and complaining about their older brother.

There is no doubt my oldest is my baddest and most obnoxious child. I think he takes pride in this. I also know that the middle and youngest boys like to instigate a fight and play victim. Sometimes I try to separate or mediate and other times, like tonight, I tire of the chaos and tell them to work it out.

Of course there needs to be a threat, such as " If I have to tell you boys one more time to be quiet and stop fighting....." followed by a consequence. Tonight's was " You won't be allowed to have a sleep-over at your cousins' house tomorrow."

A short time later, my 6 year old "baby" hands me this note ( pictured above ).

"Mom! Devon gave me this note" he whines with a sad, hurt look on his face.

" Dear Colin, You have a brain that is the size of an ant and the ant is 1/1000 of an inch." proclaims the offending missive.

" Devvvon!!" I yell " Come down here!"

My oldest promptly comes to see what I want.

" Did you write this note?" I ask

" No " he replies " That is not my writing! It looks like Colin's"

The printed note is in much neater than my 6 year old's typical writing. I look him in the eye and repeat the question. I get the same response and realize he is telling the truth. I call down my middle child. Same interrogation, same answer. I finally call down my youngest, who left the room when I called his oldest brother down.

"Colin, did you write this note?" I sternly ask while I make him look me in the eye.

" Yes..." he replied. " I did it because Devon was hurting me and I wanted to get him in trouble."

" Well it didn't work!" I said and sent Colin to his room for lying.

When he was out of earshot I looked at his brothers and warned them that they better watch out. Their baby brother is getting quite clever. One day he will get revenge and it won't be pretty. Like the bunny in "Hoodwinked", his cute, cuddly demeanor belies the evil genius that lurks within.

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

They Don't Make Them The Way They Used To

Monopoly - The Electronic Banking Edition - featuring properties from the Here & Now tm Edition
One of the many presents my boys received this Christmas, was this new modern edition of Monopoly. The new Electronic Banking version eliminates the need for paper money with programmable debit cards.
My boys immediately were excited about not having to count money and that there was a new electronic gadget to play with.
1. Electronic Banking component
Boys: Love it: Faster playing time and it " teaches you how to use a credit card".
Mom: Hate it: Eliminates the educational component of counting money and making change.

The next difference we noticed was in the game pieces. The Race Car, Thimble, Shoe, Cannon, Money Bag & Dog have been replaced with a Space Shuttle, Ball Cap, Altoids??!!, Flat Screen TV, A "Segway" and a Tiny Dog in a Handbag.
2. New Modern Game Tokens
Boys & Mom:
Hate it!:
We agree that the new ones are too modern and we all have our old favorites. I'm not ready to replace my shoe with a Segway!

Updated properties and $million dollar plus price tags are another update I could do without!
The game board looks like it was designed by Donald Trump, perhaps an Apprentice project gone terribly wrong.

Gone are the Railroads, Waterworks & the Electric Company; replaced with Airports, Cell Phone & Internet providers. Park Place & Boardwalk are now Fenway Park and Times Square. Rents are in the thousands, designated by a k after a 2 or 3 digit number.

3. New Board Design, Property Names & Price Tags
Boys and Mom:
Not loving it!
Once again we are in agreement. The new game board looks odd. We all prefer the old board & properties. I rather not have inflation adjusted prices. A bit too much realism.

If we wanted reality, we'd play a video game like Grand Theft Auto!

The reason I love to have family board game nights is to pay homage to days of yore; the family life that June Cleaver and Andy Griffith epitomized. Even re-makes of my favorite cartoons are getting "jacked-up". Alvin & the Chipmunks, Speed Racer.....

Why do we always try to come up with new & improved, modernized versions of a timeless classic???? Somethings should be left alone! I give this new version - 2 thumbs down!

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Holiday Newsletters - The One I've Been Waiting For

I decided to file this one under "Color Me Bitter".
This is a post for those of us that get at least one newsletter each year that is "over the top" and brings out the "hater" in you.

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Tis The Season - To Use Your God-Given Talents

Just when I thought I couldn't take any more depressing Holiday news stories, I saw this gem of an article that left me choked up. It has all the makings of a Holiday classic. I bet Hollywood will buy the story rights and make a movie!

The Rev. Hamilton Coe Throckmorton gave each adult in his congregation $50 and the goal of using their God-given talents to double the money to raise funds for the church's mission work.

To find out what happened, click on the link below!
Columbus Dispatch 12/21/07 Better to Give

Friday, December 21, 2007

Reasons to Have Children - IV

Reason # 4 : They help you discover the magic of the holidays.

Sometimes it takes having children to discover the wonderful treasures that surround us.

Yesterday we took our kids to view the Holiday Lights that our suburb sponsors. My camera battery ran out of juice and I only got a few shots. I think we'll come back tomorrow if the weather is still nice for walking around.

If I didn't have children, I probably wouldn't have taken the time for an evening stroll at the downtown park. If I took the same tour without my children, it wouldn't have been as delightful.

Friday, December 14, 2007

Tis the Season - To Reach Out to Your Neighbor

Yesterday my friend David called me to see if he could purchase unsaleable food items at a reduced cost from my shop. There is a blind Nun he regularly visits and a few elderly neighbors that don't appear to have family and are too proud to ever ask for help. David wanted to make up some Holiday Food Baskets to take to them.

I told him NO! I couldn't take money and would gladly give him a nice selection of items that are either near their sell by date, recently expired or goods marked " Sample". I told him he could bring me a sandwich from my favorite bakery.

It made me feel good to be able to help out, and even better to not only get my favorite sandwich but a piece of my favorite cake ( Carrot Cake )!!!!

I wish more people would take the time to look out for their neighbors. This is what helps make the world a better place and what the "Season" is all about!

Reasons to Have Children - III

Reason # 3 - They make good blankets!

When my children were smaller, I loved to take naps with them.

Babies are warm & snuggly and little heat factories! Sadly, I understood why Michael Jackson affectionately called his son "Blanket".

Sunday, December 9, 2007

Tis the Season - Random Holiday Bits

The Naughty list! -

Columbus, Ohio - woman knocks over 69 year old nun after stealing a teacher's purse at a Catholic school. The purse snatcher had pushed the nun to the ground by her neck, breaking her cross.
Looks like someone's getting coal in their stocking this year!
December 7, 2007 The Columbus Dispatch-Woman wanted in theft at school

Brooklyn New York Mailman arrested for pocketing greeting cards to get at cash inside.
I guess he can fahgeddabout his holiday bonuses from his customers.

Kosher Ham?

Balducci's apologizes for signing error.

To our valued customers:

We apologize for this unfortunate error and oversight. It was never our
intention to offend anyone, especially during this holiday. We will be
reviewing our employee training policy. We understand why this is
offensive and please know we are attempting to determine the source
of the error.

To see what this apology is about :
see what NancyKay Shapiro found for Hannukah at her local
gourmet grocery.

Saturday, December 8, 2007

Burger Boys

We had dinner last night at Frisch's Big Boy. The boys had some kid's meal coupons from Halloween and we thought we'd have a family dinner out. When I was a teenager we used to hang out at the local Big Boy. It was a blast from the past. I don't think much has changed. Same menus, same icon dressed in checkerboard overalls.

As we opened the menus to order and I stared at the shiny image of the smiling mascot, I had an epiphany. Big Boy and Burger King might be related. They both have shiny fiberglass faces, although Burger King is way creepier.

I stared at the photo of Big Boy and wondered if this is what Burger King looked like as a boy.
If so, what made him turn so weird and scary?

Reasons to Have Children - II

Reason #2 - Cheap Labor

" Billy-Bob-Joe-Bubba-Harris Jr. the 3rd." - 10 years old

Note the many breaks, mostly to either watch a cartoon or play a video game.
I guess you get what you pay for!!!

Friday, December 7, 2007

Reasons to Have Children

Reason 1.: They provide you with fine art!

Alex - Age 9

Colin - Age 6